30 Day Challenge – Day 7

7. What is your dream job, and why?

Dream job? oh my…. when I was younger I wanted to work at an animal shelter, and well I guess I accomplished that. Then when I was older I wanted to work in a vet clinic and went to school for it and didn’t really accomplish that, due to bad experiences. I am still working at an animal shelter.

What I really would like to do is go work at Best Friends Animal Society in Utah. It’s the largest no kill shelter in America. It has a full vet staff, along with acres of land, and tons of animals. Help out animals in every way possible and every one that comes in get’s a chance. Michael Vick’s pit bulls that were rescued, 22 of the most deemed dangerous went there, and were worked with, a lot of them all have homes now and some still and some will forever reside at the sanctuary.

Those following me, know  I love animals and helping animals in any way possible is what I love to do. So I’ve already accomplished that. I can’t picture my life without animal or without helping animals. It’s just who I am.

30 Day Blog Challenge – Day 6

6. What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?

In my 24 years, I can’t really say there been too much. You would think being taken away from my parents would be hard. But as a kid, I don’t think at five years old you really comprehend what is going on. I did cry my first night away, and I did always want to go home, and for the longest time it was sad, But once I got older it was more appreciated because it was to better myself in the future, and now I am thankful for the things I have been able to experience, because of being placed into foster care.

I have yet to loose a family member or someone close to me, this I am grateful for and I know it will kill me when it does happen. I have however lost 3 of my own dogs, and about 5 of my shelter dog and those experiences each were completely different and killed me each time.

Out of my own dogs, I had Dryfus he was a german shepherd collie mix, I knew him since I was 5, was never allowed near him as a kid. He was always the dog outside tied up in the yard. When I was 16 during the summer of 2003 I was able to bond and care for dryfus. I spend almost 7 months with him, he ended up with hip dysplasia and had to be euthanized. A month before my foster mother got a puppy and named him charlie, three months after dryfus was euthanized, charlie died from parvo. A year later a new dog, who would be named charlie entered my life. For two years me and charlie were inseparable, he went everywhere with me and my life was planned around him, with him. Two years later he was hit by a car, charlie death hurt me more then anything. I lost my best friend, coming home felt empty, waking up felt empty. Everything I did with him and he was no longer there, it just felt empty. It took me a long time to get over this. Even now when I look at his pictures it still makes me sad. It’s been five years, I have two dogs, but none will ever replace charlie, or any of them. They are all special and touch your heart in a different way.

Charlie<3

My shelter babies are a whole different story, it so hard not to get attached, and there just a few that touch my heart. You work with them, you bond with them, you build this relationship with them, and then the next thing you know, it’s gone, you couldn’t save them. The pain, and disappointment when I feel like I’ve let them down, is just sad. It’s not like you really let them down, because you do what you can for whatever time you have with them, and it makes there last moment wonderful. What more can you ask, right?

I don’t know, it’s hard, it’s tough, it’s my life. I think about them all the time, I try not to think about how society failed them. I don’t believe I failed them, maybe I did? I think society has a huge rule to place in the way our animals are being treated and how over run shelters are. It’s sad.

I guess I’m a boring person, when the hardest times in my life is losing my animals. But I choose to work with animals, So it’s like I bring the sadness on to myself. I could stop, but what about those happy moments, they make it worth it. But it still hurts regardless, and each time is a whole different pain. It doesn’t ever get better. It’s a sad truth, to doing something you love.

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 5

5. What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?

My family, because lets face it, without my parents I wouldn’t be here. =)

My dogs, Lou and Missy are my life. I don’t know what I would do without them. Coming home to them here, makes everyday less lonely. Puts a smile on my face after a hard day of work.

My friends, I have a few close friends, who help be get by in life. Always there when I need them and always there to listen no matter what.

Having a place to sleep at night. There a lot of homeless people out there, sleeping wherever, I am happy I have a place to come home to and call my own. Times are tough and I do not make lots of money, but I make enough to be able to afford somewhere to sleep.

Food, because well you got to eat.

I don’t have much in my life but somedays it just the little things is all you need.

 

30 Day challenge- Day 4

Sorry I dissapeared!, My weekends are busy with work!

4. List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.

Oh dear lord! Knowing what I know now, I’ve for sure changed from who I was when I was 16.

I would tell myself that things do get better, even if you don’t believe when everyone tells you this. High school (or in my case our school was from grade 7- grade 12 all in the same building) is one of those many challenges , you just need to get through it.

I was bullied growing up, couldn’t even walk up the street without people yelling at you, calling you names. It was quiet sad. Then going to school and the same things happening. Once I got to grade 10, I just gave up. My dogs growing up were my comfort and got me through a lot. I would tell myself don’t be stupid, you don’t need those scars, they will be nothing but consistent reminders of the pain you went through, and you don’t need to re-live any of that.

Those kids that pick on you and your sister are a waste of time, don’t let them get to you. They clearly have their own issues to deal with and putting you and your sister down is how they cope. Don’t be angry , feel sad for them.

Once you make it out of high school things will be better. You grow up, you look at things differently and you will move on with your life and you will be happy. You don’t need to be sad, just focus on what makes you happy and ignore those who try to bring you down.

I don’t really feel as a kid any of us, really know what were doing, it’s all in the moment, We don’t think of the consequences of our actions. We do everything to fit in, or everything to stand out. It’s not about the future and it’s not about the past, it’s about right now. But I think that’s a part of growing up, we make mistakes and learn from them, we go through sad times, to enjoy the happy moments.

Growing up will leave you physically, mentally and emotionally scared. I feel like that’s just part of life. We all deal with it in our own ways, and it will define you as a person. There are things I will I had not done growing up, but for the most part I wouldn’t change it, I wouldn’t take it back and I wouldn’t wish any of the pain I went through on anybody. It made me who I am today and I like to think I turned out pretty okay.

30 Day Challenge – Day 3

3. Describe your relationship with your parents.

Funny. my mommy was just calling me. I was placed into a foster home when I was 5 years old. Seen my parents during visiting times, once or twice a month I believe. I did seem them regularly. As a 5 year old taken away from their parents, I guess I never really knew what was going on. I remember visiting with my parents, separately, because they split it up after me and my sibling were placed in foster care. I used to always ask “when are we going back home.” Both of them would always say soon. So I was always waiting for soon. It actually took until a few years ago for me to realize, when I asked that question, both my parent thought I was asking when I’d be going back to my foster home, not back with them. Truth was I was never going back home.

I think I have a good relationship with my mom, she calls me often. A little to much at times. I think I am still the baby to her. She does have a mental disability , kinda like where her mind isn’t all there or something like that. Regardless she does still seem to be proud of me, and making her laugh , makes me smile. She might not be perfect but she is still my mom, the best thing she ever did for me and my sibling was to give us up, so we could better ourselves. She a brave women in away,

I don’t have much of a relationship with my dad, I visit him when I come home and he always happy to see me. My brother takes care of him for the most part.

But that’s about all I have to say about that.