30 Day Challenge- Day 2


2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.

1 Drowning-

I was never much of a swimmer, and as much as I love going to the beach and being in the water. I have always had this fear of drowning. Drop offs in the water scare me, I remember when I was like 12 on a class field trip, I was playing catch or something and I missed the ball and went to get it and there was a drop off, which I didn’t know about or knew they existed for that matter, I went into a complete panic and my teacher had to come save me. I refuse to jump off anything or go into water that is over my head. I have become a little bit better at swimming but I still have this fear.

I remember being in a pool, and going out to the deep end in a life jacket and then panicking and almost drowning my foster mother and not even realizing it. I don’t really know why I have this fear , I guess not being able to breath underwater just scares me.

2.Not Reaching My Goals-

I don’t really know if it counts as a fear, coming up with three legit fears that don’t include hiding from spiders isn’t as easy as I thought.

There so many things that I want to do, and I want to do while I am young and able to do them. But lately I feel like I don’t accomplish anything. I just make enough to get by, and even then that is a struggle sometimes. I am aware we all go through this at some point, and it is part of life.

It makes me so mad when I hear about people who go on about how they don’t have to work, they get enough money because of this and that, and those people who’s other half pays for everything and they don’t have to worry about anything? Really? Really? I work hard for what I have, I live alone, I don’t get full time hours at work, I take care of myself and my animals, and no I don’t have a lot of money, but what I do have, I can surely say I have done it with NO HELP from anyone at all! It’s tough. If you have read my about page, you would know about the places I want to go see and visit, I feel like I will never get there, and peoples consistent reminders how how they have everything just kills me some days. I try my best to stay positive, pay days are always disappointing.  Seeing those places are very important to me, not getting there would be disappointing, for me it would mean I have not accomplished anything, I am just stuck here. Not moving forward in my life, just neutral. I don’t want that to be an option. I don’t think this counts as a fear?

3. Being Unhappy

I have been very depressed, growing up. Maybe it was just a phaze of growing up. Maybe it just a part of being on my own and far away from family. Maybe it’s those annoying people who have everything and don’t need to work that just drive me nuts. I feel like I am just not completely happy with my life, I like to think this will change eventually. But I have this fear that maybe I will always feel like I’m alone and just sad. Maybe this is just a part of finding myself and who I am. I don’t really know. But I sure hope there will be a point in my life where I can feel content and not always sad.

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